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The Laurie & Lynn Show

Feb 8, 2014|

Saturday February 8, 2014

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Automatically Generated Transcript (may not be 100% accurate)

The following is a paid program the views or claims made or not necessarily those of WI OK staff management or sponsors and it's time for -- -- -- Just don't you only do. -- -- -- You -- okay. Good morning good morning. How are you doing today health Cano sent a little cold kind of -- But a belated happy birthday yes thank you fans. It was a very lovely birthday celebration and as we probably shouldn't say it because our friends who thinks all we ever do is go out needs. Would be excessive -- -- -- kids and saying yeah a bit they go again and you know our limits Ina -- would say how bad kidnapping yeah. Yeah so we had a wonderful time on -- birthdays. And we have to say that we we did not do what we told everybody we were going to do clueless and I ask Lisa we were going to be good that we were all going to be at the lake for Super Bowl you know -- And didn't turn out that way it's a long story but we ended up being together anyway for the probably one of -- worse boring boring boring Super Bowls ever on record. But camp okay. So I guess so and so let's not boring if you're Seahawks fan but it was boring and -- -- scoring any other one isn't it's bordering there was like to know analogy exactly two assists and had. Have I -- fear -- and then I say. Cool is a Seahawks fan. -- -- well you know who got. Yahoo! catch her face that was an idea you know -- for me now now -- -- so anyway we endured to. The Super Bowl and we know cake anyway after that so we had a birthday cake for -- and I -- And then the real thing on Tuesday and I went out with a bunch of my from other friends on -- Monday Monday no deaths CNN. China Myanmar -- a situation where might sound I thought it was here. Allow you know I try to push the outlook for at least a month and -- -- you see what happens. -- well that's good for the yes speaking of football how about. -- two local boys done. He's done very very well done goodies they say it's much fun -- one bay movies Scranton prep senior who just signed. Today our -- the -- was talking to on Thursday so we signed Thursday and then -- but they had to do the actual. Faxing in south fun I'm yesterday the fifth. And he's going to Penn State and I was reading the paper this morning. The interview with him. You know with his and he spoke about him that he if they interviewed him and then his mom and dad and I'm sitting there crying B scores I don't know no law. But I know was mum and more importantly I know his aunt aunt Sharon and who is his mom's sister. And and is my my best friends and she loves this kid and I was breeding what his mindset about a minute just it just brings back he just feels so good about it there's nothing like that mother son relationship. And they were saying that the mum you know has to let him go in the father so proud and it's. It's done in mid may be made me cry because I think it's they've worked so hard and then of course James McHale who's with I had done more senior done where he's he signed with temple -- And I know I'm James dad. Martin Campbell is a wonderful guy in this his mom who is a delight a sister Kathy and the day you just know these families and and these kids work so hard and James and the snow are huge kids. So I am and worked so hard and so we're very proud of them so no -- Scranton prep senior gone to Penn State and James McHale. The I've done more senior going to the temple so congratulations to them and their families we look forward to hearing lots of good things about them. And so that's the football knows okay as an end as the area. I collide cirrhosis yes there is. Matt -- yes that's February 20 and local boy does good yes. Yes and they're doing what's it's like a tribute to math class -- -- and they're moving from the traditional April. Due in February to accommodate -- schedule so yes because to be back in training camp and CNN. -- that's sure I'll be very going to. And that I was I don't know why you should try -- I'm telling them that rose to I was rose to two years ago yes I'm married I do. -- Manny -- last year and so now they moved it up to -- south. And -- -- Barbara. But Harris husband has -- vice president of -- -- and that is their responsibility before the year of presidency to. Do that fund raiser I -- I couldn't. Well but he's got some work cut out for a yes he did -- wow was he lucky to have a -- no pain and mental wreck the F thrilling end. Yep and you know I wanna say -- how about CBS said their. I think that's pretty incredible I don't tell and I am surprised honestly that's for so many years all of the large pharmacy chains. Have continued. Two at the same time they sell this stuff to help break -- -- is trying to Diallo is selling cigarettes and there's something fundamentally wrong with that. But I guess trying to notice there's still I forget what that number was that they mentioned last night about how many Americans still smoke -- And so. You know it comes down to personal liberties and -- the kind of things that we talk about all the time. But I just feel like it's sending the wrong message from a corporate. Structure. You can't. You can't be both DA got him decide what you wanna do here because if you are supporting to have as you can also sell products that tried not to get off -- group. So I'm thinking more on the health care round which is what you would consider a final have to be. And so that's good for the first 7600. Stores that. And October will be the end of it so I'm that's a good thing. Any -- party has done it prior to that is so I don't know I think that's Wal-Mart and the target India was in the paper today. Well they they really should be all doing -- yeah I mean -- there's enough places that they sell them and you know winning in it's it's say it's it's become. Now at -- we don't know because we don't smoke but it people who have an addiction to cigarettes isn't it's a physical. Addiction as well as a -- -- it's it's just awful it's an awful thing from when I hear people who have quit or try to. It's very very very hard but I just came -- that that you did smoke I smiled I smoked two packs a day so much. Yeah well into the night with in my twice. I may and I and I stopped. By -- -- -- Turkey. I'm like I did. Because it was in February and I was with some friends. And we all went to a place where we had several drinks at the bar which is another thing I don't do a simple. How boring drink at the bar drink in general great comment and -- and these words. You know mixed drinks this was not like I was in a hurry is a cigarette right -- it it does and that was higher -- there was one hand had a cigarette the other hand this momentum. And before we got to. Sit down for dinner. I knew at that point there's already wasted. But I think well -- What's the difference don't listen to the I toilet first place the couple up just polish Shirley was there I would just the other side of that so it's good. And it was a February night and it was one of those where it was rain that turned into sleet. And of the main roads were fine and I should and even -- driving but I did. And I drove home. And clarks summit. And my parents were living on carnation drive -- if you're familiar with carnation drive as the very -- don't know where it is yes OK nine. So when I turned off -- 611 the main road and went on to the first two. Street so I came to it was a C device -- And so I had to I saw cars -- for enemy spinning going around in circles as the well I have to walk home. So I pulled the car over onto the side of the road where -- -- the tires were on the grass on the other tires were sitting on the road. And I abandoned the car and I had a lock. And I walk home. And when I got in the front door my lungs were on fire because -- the -- of the cold and the smoking. And that's what and the mom and I just said that's it done. While and that was in 1983. So how many years is and 8136 or Santa I have ID six I haven't had a cigarette since sun. -- So I hit the eastern US we're actually spinning your well you all know that's what scared me when I watch so -- in front of me to that is said well I guess I'm not trying to -- Now that was pretty bad and then I didn't I had no boots on and there was snow on the ground but because of this rain there was a coding on the snow. So I couldn't walk on the road and a walk in the you know -- crunched down every time with no boots on so. Neuroses and you know how I go home because. It was just your -- everywhere while. So there was this from AS does not own their worst reformed smokers are worse than nonsmokers than anybody says -- Why so I mean it's hard that's -- it is but I mean you we can sit here and say -- you're a different story but I can see parents say I don't do it it's terrible that the don't even get started to but it is from what I hear and people going no smoke who want to have. The addictive physical addiction is off soft tennis. So just mean so I feel badly the people who want a -- can't yeah but those who still love it and I know people who cool squish who just wish they can pick up another cigarette no. But a good thing they don't. Well I would say the same thing I enjoy there's -- -- -- you want to -- yeah. This and there are times well for the that the habits that you form around it is what's so hard to break I used to drink coffee in the morning which I don't drink anymore. But every time I drank a cup of coffee I wanted to cigarette with the economy and that's how you started the day to. And that and I just I don't drink coffee anyway they drink tea but that was pretty bad tee. Think -- -- -- -- to Croats can't cook but -- -- -- good things and people can get the cigarettes where they the other places but. Yes they -- should be hydrated. -- I don't think that's right movement since I was good and I am a woman I'm not and there was a woman who they interview and I can't even name Alicia did -- -- -- she's the CEO or what her role as but it was a woman. Who may then at the announcement and said you know the film moves like I don't know two billion dollars or something. But that doesn't in my unit get up countering for the health care price. Which is good yeah that's some really good thing. Yes so they were there -- good thanks. And the snow. The other day Harry was his ghost town headlines today in -- -- amounts of. So no we're everywhere. Scary. And still is I don't like it's like an old fashioned snowstorm we were younger. Yeah because I don't remember seeing snow this high piled up in a long time time know. Maybe I'm wrong but doctored to nova posted something on FaceBook -- -- That in her front yard I guess it was her from her driveway. When they can -- the driveway into her house she had a fifteen foot. Snow bank as well and she took pictures. That's good if you could just as you see it was season dual stack you know but it's just funny the seat -- because we never get back cuts down. I liquid due for another -- and I don't know what's happening Sunday and trying to ignore them so don't talk about. We don't talk like a lot happened ultrasound and then yesterday also we did have. It was a very nice the Jersey boy he. Are the Jersey boys are in town as a from Tuesday February 4 through the sixteenth. And done the press conference yesterday the mayor pro claimed he in February 4 through the sixteenth Jersey boy -- -- -- Scranton and the two commissioners. I am an air currents there but from the city side and the county side was mayor I'm was sent to commissioner. One Zack and O'Malley and they proclaimed. -- Jersey for a day yesterday February 5 and -- the four guys were there -- both -- normal. I didn't really talk to Murphy gets to know them but they're so cute. And that talented because they're reviews are. Manning a strong good and done is about 21000. Tickets sold for this round hole. So isn't that nice tone get drilled and of course Helene has been pulling your hair out and 21 -- allowed to keep on gas and crude yes and that wonderful. And a first time ever that in the history of Broadway theater league that they've done a two week run blend and and so far it's very very successful well Frankie valley when he played. -- cultural center for Broadway couple years ago it was packed packed people -- to a standing dancing wouldn't sit down it was. You know kind of I guess that's same. I'm assigned to some Estelle she -- well I guess you know an Italian thing in yeah -- -- remember that there's so many Italians in this region and it's it's some it's all good so -- as we're gonna take a really quick break. You're listening this morning tomorrow human -- It's Saturday morning with the Korean -- and now. -- -- Good morning went back you're listening to lie mainly show I'm learning Canon and the owner Larry can enterprises which is a fundraising PR and special event business. And I'm whenever and Saddam the president and CEO of northeastern financial consultants. Where fee only financial planning firm in clarks summit. Yale Sosa to payoff the markets when you retire. I don't know I only say well here's what I would say what you're not retired I always tell people are you crazy to do that in the right off his grade and what's it would be doing now for rallies say that but I'm no accountant I just believe that the right after so. So good free OK so then when you retire your taxes in your tax bracket -- now I guess would be different your tax. I can't. Bracket but I don't mean that what your obligation is different so I don't know if it's my thing -- retire I would so move you have to chat but I don't want that there's some. Answers for this I'm curious also from your perspective as a real turn. Do you see people I'm looking when they go to buy homes -- say they're in their sixties and they're downsizing. And they say well yeah I think I needed a different house was on the big monster were raised the kids and now we're getting a new house but I wanna get a mortgage. Do you see in them shortening the mortgages so they can get -- paid off for a quick or did you see people take in thirty markets just. I don't really had lived if it and I am. Most of the people that I dealt with really are not in that they're now and then again at age group -- but. I'm. I do know I do -- in particular know someone who recently wants to sell to get out of the house but they're not even buying they're going to -- temporarily. -- because they feel. That if they want to move out of town to be close to a child's. They can have that opportunity right now and if they decide to buy it they -- they definitely want a town home because they do not. Wanna have to worry about the upkeep. Outside that is the biggest thing that people. The snow in this region there is no and that's that's kinda stuff they just off the grass -- they just don't wanna have to do what they want someone -- to be responsible and live. The life they wanna live stats more of what I hear and never really hear people say. I'm doing this 'cause I don't -- mortgage that's never really been said directly to make. -- -- -- -- from my experience and end of the people that we see as clients. And they can they come from all different. Parts of a different types. Of -- businesses. Different types of careers it's not anything that I would say is. Universally so but I do think that. For the most part in our culture we've always been taught that debt is bad. The only old story if you if you can't afford to buy you don't tie -- to credit card -- terrible car loans are awful and we have almost -- stuff but somehow. A mortgage is kind of a place that walks in between there. You know mortgage is good debt yeah -- -- say that break and most people who who really are the first to. Dead in general will be okay with a mortgage because for some reason that works I'm not sure why but it does. But the the what are the things that I see that I think is really. Silly when they come right down what is people who take money that they have accumulated. For retirement for the purpose of creating income for them. And they use that money to pay cash to buy a house because they don't want the deaths. And the philosophy as well I don't know mortgage payment and I don't need them much money. So therefore I can get rid of it now but here's Salinas and that's the -- -- -- -- -- Mortgage rates right now are historically low. You can make more money. Investing and -- certainly out then and then actually paying off a mortgage because it doesn't make sense if you can get. And we were talking last week with the NATO I think we were talking about their about a 44 and a half percent for thirty year mortgages. Even up to five if that was the case. Them but the performance in the stock market the last couple years has been double digits. So are right there are sometimes when you have a bad year and you have good years but if you average this thing out. It's better off for you to keep the money invested and have been available for whatever you may need the future. If you make a lot of money and some particular year maybe you wanna go on vacation but she can't. -- you can't. Sell off a room in the house to get them money -- that's that's the point -- makes of people you have no flexibility. Yeah it's an all or nothing deal with the market. Yes you can go backing get a home equity loan but why would -- -- borrow the money when you could make the money on your own. That's very important have to think about and then the other thing is that you can it you can do some kind of a reserve fund if you wanna call -- that's. If you don't if you can take everything you've got to pay off your mortgage then if you need money for something and especially the number. I think the number two reason for bankruptcy in this country isn't medical deaths. The people get themselves involved in huge amounts of of food costs relative to care for. Can't serve for other things and they just they don't have the money above and beyond what their deductible is in order take care of us. If you put all their money into the house. It's going to be awfully hard to get their money back out if it would make a difference between UN bankruptcy it's really hard to lose the house did lose everything. So I I don't really think it makes sense as long as you can afford it maybe you wanted to do something like as we talked about before I'm used to. And get out of the big house and get down of the smaller house. And that and then the mortgage payments a lot less and if you stretch out over thirty years it's doable. But for most people in our area. Their kids aren't coming back to to live in their house -- so if you've got a mortgage balance and you pass a way. The kids get the difference but in the meantime you've had the benefit. Of announced a -- -- how I feel like I think that's what a lot of people. Stay in their homes that are paid off a lot of times he even if they aren't too large for them. Because maybe everyone could comment Thanksgiving and Christmas or whatever. Because. They think they have the emotional attachment to the house and don't wanna sell it do you. And B they don't have a mortgage payments so why do they wanna take on the rent obligation. In it or and or another mortgage I mean that's why I think people do it. But then I'm looking at the Carl's so you believe that it should let luckily loosely today announced that they don't want to pay anything. For the Anthony has and people can use the equity in those homes and for reverse more I know that and that has been some things in the last two or three years. That has dramatically risen in popularity because they changed a lot of things that we're really. Negative about that. In the laws so that it's a much more attractive thing for people to look at in reverse mortgages. So -- you may meet and it's a reverse mortgage so you're not paying that you're actually getting income from how. And that's not a bad thing to extend a personal gets the house is obligated to settle works -- and it works it works I was because there still equity and how I therefore the bank would take the equity. And whatever the differences is what he would get. Right but still somebody's -- and that the difference. Only only how much do you see I'm not that says yes but I so I'm in some cases it makes sense that's why you have to run numbers take a look at it but it's not a bad deal. And I think people need to take a look now at the situation. That is. The current interest rates on mortgages. Vs what you could make in the markets or somewhere else and and see -- it makes sense -- mortgages were 18%. No makes it makes sense I know you know so I think it's it it some people just as we talked last. Week about the twelve dead myths that people. Have -- -- so deeply ingrained in all -- we don't even think about it. But that's one of them is that. You need to pay off your mortgage when you retire. It's just part of our culture you think you need to do that and it's not necessarily. The best thing to do. I tried so tell people that I do I tell them let's let's look at it let's just not make the assumption that that's how it should be but let's take a look and see if there are other ways students who most people who commend you in that situation -- the opposite of what you're gonna talented don't. Do they think they should. Not have the mortgage yes yes it absolutely and it's not even a question and -- -- pay off the mortgage and I want to do this reminder that well. Doing that is not necessarily that idea. So. That's -- something let's go back so we didn't finish. So last week at twelve debt mess we we have for -- time we just five of them we started we talked about. Borrowing money or getting money as a gift. From. Your family and that's where we stopped. So number six and that message is today's tight lending criteria applies to auto loans so. That's necessarily true. You can still get auto loans that's a little. Less. Strict than mortgages and home but you can still get -- apply for auto loans even if your your credit does not absolutely perfect. Time and then part that's because our loans come with a lower delinquency rate and therefore their less risky I think killed if you lose they are with the same. Automobile. Dealer then and they have credit for -- whether. Cause or. Police saying EU and you've been paying them they look at deaths from that standpoint I know that happened yeah if -- if it's a local bank that's underwriting. -- -- but sometimes national. Companies have to go by and whatever -- rules are soon. Some if she agreed to separate your debts in a divorce it's separate. A -- necessarily suffered unless you do all the paperwork and get that separated. Most people think that that's just there. -- like this person who was director of public education and experience which is one of the three top credit agencies. People think I went to the divorce I had the decree why is the joint -- still there what you'll need to do -- call the lender and figure out how the joint debt. The -- it's a credit cards student loan or mortgage can be placed in the name of only one X-Files. Sometimes Leonard -- will require you to close the joint account and transfer the debt balance to a -- count. Number eight high in common and credit score means -- pitch the lowest interest rates on credit cards. -- not always true. Lowest rate cards go for a run 11%. If it's a rewards card and that's something that people need -- remember. When you get. Fewer American Express rewards points or. Frequent flier miles and mess -- you're actually paying for that. Because. If the interest rates they charge in the balances is much higher than it would be if you've just got to straighten credit card from a bank. I think I don't know chaos every month without your hand to hand them until April 12. Yeah I just look at the points but a lot of people don't realize. That is the lowest rate possible on some of these rewards cards has left -- percent to you can get lower than that on a regular. Timer -- 1 -- so between seven and a quarter an 8%. I'm straight or marrying credit card. Number nine if you've looked up your credit score you know your credit score. The only know one credit score problem is the lenders may be looking at different credit score and you are. And there's no way for you to know -- it's better or worse. So if you use the fight Coast Guard -- sixty slightly different iterations of Franco. That's a little bit closer to what your actual credit score would be. Can -- which one is that what's. Which was -- number was that I was nine -- number ten. A late credit card payment will damage your credit necessarily. One time. But I mean if you're really really late like ninety days past that's a little -- and your credit report but. If you have a reason for fanatic and you say so. Number eleven -- mortgage and home equity interest is deductible. It is only up to a certain amount but I think most of everybody just listening to this won't have too much of problematic because. You can only deduct interest somewhere he's up to a million hunters spent so if you're worried just two million you can typically deduct only half of the I -- sad about isn't -- and the twelfth is buying a home with cash is the best option if you have the money we just talked about that not tonight plus. Okay well we're going to be right back will be up with attorney Barbara O'Hara let's take a real quick break you're listening to -- -- -- -- It's Saturday morning with the Korean -- and now. -- -- Good morning once again your listening to the Marion Lynn -- Please excuse my. Voice that this little bit of a cold and Lynn had to cut out of here a little bit early. So we're here with our resident expert attorney Barbara O'Hair who's been in need worlds of divorce and family -- for now -- what 3032 years really years every year gets -- so figure it. It's nice to be here with him when -- Q. Fired is with the loss from a partner in the last -- -- huge Hughes Nickels and -- harrah's and there and done more on drinker street. And -- is here today and we're gonna talk adultery do we have your attention we are talking about adultery. Because fired for saying earlier we have so many people the interest. The understanding. He what do I do now would be. How Hawaii find out for sure all of those things that enters into a divorce. More than contemplation of divorce this sort of talk a little bit about that so -- first off good morning. Good morning and their recent while I suggested this is because. In my practice I'm seeing more and more and I think one of the things that's happening. Is in the last decade you see a lot more people with social networks getting like reaching out to people figuratively. That may not have gone out you know they. May be a person's home with their family and they start you know going on the Internet and chip -- connecting with. Friends that they had to learn -- from new acquaintances. And you're seeing more and more that there's an allure to. An online relationship. That many many times becomes an in person relationship or that it becomes and it's such a strong online relationship that there's an infidelity. Like in a motion then. Is that true is if it is strictly just an Internet -- think she can it be proven seems to be well and adulterous relationship. Corset jury's still out now well tendon and that's OK let the court says where there's opportunity and inclination really. You know where there's not an act that. Consummate the relationship it's not really adultery but did you see you know -- it. People lose affection for their spouse's -- and all they care about is. That connection on the Internet or calling them on the cellphone and you get more and more of this -- -- more lesson. And it adultery in. In the affection from rather than the act in her tank. That ended their feelings are for another person that all they wanna do is talk on the phone with the southern personally wanna do is go home and see. Or go on their on their iPhone and see what they're saying yes what's so what are they saying what are they doing where. And you know really their spouse plays very little role in their life do you find that's bad because in years say my -- route from pre. I -- Internet. Dead women need it by and large would have affairs for the emotional attachment and men usually for the sexual attachment. Yeah I don't find that it's switching a little now because if it's just strictly on the Internet an obvious and there is now say -- someone who hasn't met and that. That affection that that emotion is being met more than the physical right well into people are closer proximity. It it goes from. From an online relationship to happen diversity question hasn't gotten to that part she seems like that's train into little more on the emotion on the guys side. Yes -- has been in in yes and the blame for many years to be honest with each he sees people carrying on. A relationship. And you know it starts out innocently enough to -- and then beat it becomes very something else are consuming so what what do you recommend if someone. If -- stay if they think this is happening in vain no way it. The spending of the money that time many takes what would you recommend to -- typically let people do is in and they'll come in and now. They'll have the telephone records of their have a text messages are. Whatever and -- talent. First off if it's going towards a divorce to preserve those kind of thanks because what happens this is -- -- party doing it. Frequently he denies that now awareness that adultery. Come into play in divorce years ago and when. It was just fault divorces. They adultery would be grounds for divorce and it still is but very few people pursue part of horses anymore. I'm kind of over -- nine -- 5% are no Fatah forces. So it's not such a big factor when it comes to that. But it is a factor if your spouse is seeking for you to -- also support. It is a factor if your spouse is looking for alimony after the decree it's one of seventeen factors so and the reason for the -- of support is say look at this and say why should you have to pay for an -- else. That has cheated on you and now. Says but I need support from. And then it's what a seventeen factors as to whether or not you can alimony after the divorce decree century. For those reasons I tell clients to collect the evidence. But in some cases where let's say there's very little chance maybe she wouldn't. The the faithful party is making more money than the unfaithful party there's very little chance said. And they said that -- OK the party committing the adultery terrain is seeking seeking alimony. That's when you should collect a kind of information. If on the other hand. How I tell people it depends on the circumstance and this is where they should see an attorney is it we're spending all the money. To hire private detective. To you know to do all those kind of things to collect that evidence in some cases -- course and anything other than confirming to you -- that your spouse's unsafe. Do you find that happening more often where private investigators are hired and do they come to you first and then say. I want to verify what I know by hiring. How does not usually hey here's that. Guy hired and here's the photos and here's the distance now what do I don't. About 5050 Calcutta where people will come in and say I know my -- is full around somebody at work -- -- Guyana in -- manner whenever. And they may come in with the proof. Or the hands they might ask me. I need it. There's a decent bit of denial in nest so a lot of times you might be there relatives are telling them. I think your spouse is cheating on them or maybe somebody's confronted them where they've got an anonymous letters or you name it. Someone has said to them I think is fastest -- And usually the person coming in doesn't want to believe -- And it it they will ask me and I look at their individual case has -- is it worth worth your while to to prove this is -- -- now. And always the court will look at the conduct prior to your separation. So it's good to have you both already separated and they are doing something now it doesn't matter. But if prior to separation. You look at and say OK will it matter later. You look to see will there be an alimony claim made by the person is guilty in the adultery do you also find too -- that I'm. Because ever commit has it is having the affair say let's just use a -- for example is having an affair do you find it easier for them to. Give him. The and the wife what she's more or less looking for because they're the -- trying to get out or is it the opposite you know light years ago when it was just. But let them prior to 1980 when the divorce code brought in no fault divorce. What happened was you had did come up with with grounds one person would be the perpetrators of the fault the other person would be innocent injured. Party and typically. The adulteress and the adulterer. Or adulterous would buy their way out of the relationship with the right give up on the assets and and and walk away -- just getting a divorce -- now. I mean it it doesn't -- that matter a great deal. Think it's not a factor when it comes to dividing up your property at all and people coming and they're very disappointed to hear that because. OK -- -- this guy did this to me and he's leaving me was on these young babies and now he wants to split things up. And I honestly. They will split things -- they want to say he walks with nothing they you know I have for the red letter on and on his chest and and you get everything. -- all know people feel like that does not have a loss in a war. Well why did they did it changed you know what the primary reason for that change from salt it's from faulty no file to a twelve to prove too crazy know what a lesson and it was a movement. The nationwide idea that it that we don't want decent long protracted divorce and where. Somebody might come in and you have to go through this grip to say. Let's say you and your -- didn't get along at all. And what would happen at that point and this was actually right when I was Indiana law school so I know it historically from older members of the bar. You would get up and one person would take the blame the other part person would be innocent spouse. And you kind of really had to. Have that kind of scenario. But reality -- like out in now because most in our innocent. The most people I -- in the -- and their and most most people. That you know all those who have been married for a long time know it takes two people -- really does so if I think if let's say you had your reconcile the differences where those viewing your spouse have -- -- charge their gone different ways and you just want to it to separate. That's the ideal case for no fault divorce because that then it's not saying oh this person did something horrible. Well you know we both have probably said things you regret spray and then he shouldn't have said. And you know find me a couple where they don't don't argue at all. And you might find people who don't care about each other. And that's which is a whole industrial prop divorce yes she can tell -- tell everybody quickly to barb what. What about the people who are entering into these accused said what do you do if you're actually and I guess people do this. Go to an -- say look it I'm in the middle of or I'm contemplating and a -- here. Well actually people don't condensate -- how does they come and and now say. My wife and I -- growing apart and how if we weren't to separate what what do you think what happened and what do you tell them. Welcome Stephen there's and it's it's another person involved who was also was in -- married there's another hole. BO that that other person did -- the person they're carrying on with never comes -- now I -- I put it but they really he -- they're very affected because you know I. A lot of times the adults tourists party. Are the adulterer would then go on and married -- person. And then you look at that say play them. If they if they did this to somebody else what are the chances -- repeat that behavior would do you know very -- don't yet I love it. It if he or she does it with -- Here she'll do it truly put it well don't even an eventually yes -- asks. Plenty more often -- and I and I think China and now have looked a lot of women and say to me. Oh well I met him and it was in the end of his marriage well I know what that shorthanded. Yeah it was at the end of his marriage because -- that was the relationship that broke up. The last marriage. So and I think people. I always talk to people about that -- effect it has on the children. Because the children look at adultery as soon as you being unfaithful to the whole family nine just unfaithful to -- To their parent. So I think a lot of people learn surprised by and that they don't think that there's going to be. Just let their child's reaction today yes but it's a very strong -- is that because they tell no pointing no way. The parents parents tell the children or you know what kids will find it now PI know okay. And a kids' kids well -- out whether it paid a candidate to be told okay the younger. Kids know I've seen a stronger reactions in the older kids -- And in one case I even had a suicide attempt of an older child because it isn't she felt that their dad was given up on wholesale yeah I know -- and I imagine it's a tough time -- Set but people don't contemplate that when there is looking at. OK I have this marriage and I had these relationships and that's a very selfish thing to do group who. But people do it now and now he can only counsel them. And hope said. The best and the outcome. Happens. But to -- to talk more about this practice this is I'm very they interesting and be disallowed more info that Kennedy had been discussed so. We -- every time in the next month when you come -- Something else so let's let's focus on these things I think it's an interesting -- kind. And you get all the time so let's talk about them. -- -- attorney Barbara lamb who is arguably the law firm of -- A hair and timely and -- -- -- -- -- at five cents and 03447171. We'll listen. Tasteless and we will listen we will listen -- have no choice please listen then weekly -- assemblies. Near here every Saturday morning some. Thanks again its value support and I have a good week to see you next week yeah thank you pleasure thank you find you safe and --